Same Sex Marriage Children

QUESTION: How would same-sex marriage hurt children?


David Blankenhorn is the founder and president of the non-partisan Institute for American Values, an organization devoted to strengthening families and civil society. Blankenhorn describes himself as a lifelong, liberal Democrat44 who disagrees with the Bible’s prohibitions of homosexuality.45 He also buys into the fallacious notion that people who have homosexual desires are somehow a special class of people who do not have equal rights.

Despite this, Blankenhorn makes a powerful case in his book, The Future of Marriage, that same-sex marriage must not be endorsed. He writes, “Here is my dilemma: With every fiber of my being, I want to affirm the equal dignity of all persons and push for equal treatment under the law. Yet I’m also a marriage nut. I’ve spent most of my professional life arguing that marriage is important and that children need mothers and fathers.”46 So while Blankenhorn sympathizes with homosexuals, he still believes that arguments against same-sex marriage far outweigh those for it.

Why? He cites some of the reasons I’ve given here, but the good of children is his most crucial reason. He observes, “Across history and cultures . . . marriage’s single most fundamental idea is that every child needs a mother and a father. Changing marriage to accommodate same-sex couples would nullify this principle in culture and in law.”47

How would same-sex marriage “nullify” parenthood and hurt children? The law is a great teacher: Once the government endorses the idea that marriage is just a legal contract between consenting adults of any gender (i.e. regardless of procreative realities), then marriage will no longer be seen as a prerequisite for children. Marriage will be seen as nothing more than coupling. In fact, that’s exactly how Andrew Sullivan sees marriage now. He writes that “coupling —not procreation—is what civil marriage now is.”48

If government-backed same-sex marriage is legalized, “coupling” is exactly how future generations will see the institution of marriage. If that view prevails, many more couples in our society will forgo natural marriage and have more children out of wedlock. Why go through the trouble of getting married to have children if marriage isn’t about children? Why tie yourself to one person if you don’t need to? This further erosion of marriage will hurt children because illegitimate parents (it’s not the fault of the children) often never form a family, and those who cohabitate break up at a rate of two to three times that of married parents.49 When illegitimacy rises, not only do children suffer, but the rest of us are forced to pay high social costs because of the resulting increases in crime, poverty, taxes, and social spending. (Recall from point 1 that children from broken homes, particularly fatherless homes, are responsible for a majority of violent crimes and youth problems.)

Compliments of Correct, not Politically Correct, authored by Frank Turek. For more information, visit

44 David Blankenhorn, “Strengthening America’s Families,” “Letters”, The Nation, October 1, 2001, posted online at See also David Blankenhorn, The Future of Marriage, (New York, Encounter Books), 2007, 302.

45 David Blankenhorn, The Future of Marriage, (New York, Encounter Books), 2007, pg. 210.

46 Ibid, pg. 128.

47 Ibid, pg. 178. Emphasis in original.

48 Also quoted by Stanley Kurtz in “Slipping Toward Scandinavia,” The National Review, February 2, 2004.

49 Stanley Kurtz, “The End of Marriage in Scandinavia,” Weekly Standard, February 2, 2004,

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